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Outbyte Driver Updater FREEScan for outdated or missing drivers - takes under a minuteDriver Scan →Outbyte PC Repair FREERepair Windows errors before they cause bigger problemsFix Now →If your parent may be in immediate danger, call 911 in the United States. If there is no immediate danger but you are worried they may attempt suicide, call or text 988, or use 988 chat. You can contact 988 as a family member seeking guidance, too. You do not have to assess or manage this alone.
What should you do first?
Take any talk of suicide seriously. If your parent is in immediate harm or danger, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline says to call 911. If the situation is not an immediate emergency, contact 988 in the United States for crisis support. Call, text, or chat at 988lifeline.org; the Lifeline says its services are free and confidential. A supporter can call 988 to ask what resources are available locally.
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If you are outside the United States, use your local crisis line or emergency number. The guidance and phone numbers here are U.S.-specific.
What can you say to your parent?
Ask directly and calmly
You can ask, “Are you thinking about suicide?” The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) includes this question in its 2024 action-step handout and says asking directly does not increase suicidal behavior or thoughts. NIMH’s five action steps offer a plain starting point when you are unsure what to say.
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Listen without trying to argue them out of it
Give your parent room to speak. Stay calm, listen without judgment, and let them describe what they are feeling. Avoid debating whether suicide is right or wrong, lecturing about the value of life, acting shocked, or brushing their distress aside with glib reassurance. You do not need a perfect response; being present and taking them seriously matters.
What if they ask you not to tell anyone?
Do not promise secrecy. If your parent tells you they have a plan to hurt themselves, involve a crisis professional and trusted support rather than agreeing to keep it between you. The 988 Lifeline says, “Never keep it a secret if a friend tells you about a plan to hurt themselves.” That principle applies when the person at risk is your parent, too. You can explain that you care about them and need help keeping them safe.
How can you help make the situation safer?
Work with your parent, when it is safe to do so, to connect them with crisis support and mental-health care. NIMH advises asking whether they have a plan and helping reduce access to highly lethal items or places. Keep this non-graphic: do not put yourself in danger or try to manage a risky situation alone. Ask 988 or another qualified professional what safety steps are appropriate.
The Lifeline’s framework is Ask, Be There, Help Keep Them Safe, Help Them Connect, and Follow Up. It is a way to involve care and connection—not a demand that a family member take sole responsibility for assessing risk. Consider bringing in a trusted relative, friend, spiritual advisor, or mental-health professional who can support your parent and share the practical load.
Which warning signs mean you should reach out?
Warning signs matter especially when they are new or increasing, or appear after a painful event, loss, or change. The Lifeline lists signs including:
- Talking about wanting to die or looking for a way to die
- Expressing hopelessness, feeling trapped, or feeling like a burden
- Increased alcohol or drug use
- Agitation, reckless behavior, rage, or extreme mood swings
- Changes in sleeping or withdrawing from other people
These signs are reasons to reach out for help, not a checklist that lets you predict what your parent will do. If you are worried, contact 988 for guidance; if immediate harm or danger is present in the United States, call 911. See the 988 Lifeline’s warning signs and ways to help for its full guidance.
Independent reader supportYour contribution helps us test, update, and keep practical guides available for everyone.How do you keep from carrying this alone?
Tell another trusted person what is happening and ask them to help with a specific task, such as staying with your parent, contacting a clinician, or checking in later. Ask crisis professionals what role is appropriate for you and what support is available for your parent. Follow up with your parent after the immediate conversation, but do not make yourself their only source of support.
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Supporting someone in crisis can bring up difficult emotions. The Lifeline encourages supporters to seek support for themselves, too. Talk with someone you trust or a mental-health professional; getting help for yourself is part of making a sustainable support plan.
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