Start with curiosity, not an accusation. Ask which chatbots or companion apps your teen uses, what they like about them, and what they would ask a human instead. Listen first, explore one example together, and then agree on privacy, fact-checking and support boundaries. Keep the conversation open: services change, and a chatbot should never replace trusted people or qualified mental-health care.
Why this conversation matters
Teenagers may use chatbots for homework, brainstorming, entertainment, advice or serious conversations. An app that responds instantly and sounds empathetic can feel very different from a search engine, even though its answers can still be wrong, incomplete or unsafe. The goal is not to ban every AI tool or to assume that use is harmful. It is to understand the role the tool plays and prevent it from displacing sleep, school, friendships, hobbies or human support.
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Common Sense Media reported in 2025 that nearly three in four U.S. teenagers ages 13–17 had used AI companions and that half used them regularly. In that survey, one third said they had chosen an AI companion over a human for a serious conversation, and one quarter said they had shared personal information with one. Those figures concern AI companions, not every kind of chatbot, and they do not represent teenagers worldwide.
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Prepare before you bring it up
Choose a calm, low-pressure moment—such as a walk, car ride or routine technology check—instead of starting during an argument about screen time. Your first aim is to learn, not to catch your teen doing something wrong.
- Know the name of the app or website, whether it is a general chatbot or an AI companion, and what your teen says it is for.
- Read the service’s current age requirements, privacy information and account controls with your teen. Do not assume that two services handle conversations in the same way.
- Decide which family values must apply everywhere: protecting personal information, checking consequential answers, keeping human support available and protecting sleep and relationships.
- Be ready to acknowledge a benefit your teen identifies. Curiosity, creativity or a private place to rehearse a question may be part of the appeal even when the tool also has risks.
Open with curiosity, not surveillance
A neutral opening makes it more likely that your teen will tell you what is actually happening. You could say:
“I’m trying to understand these tools better. Have you used an app that talks with you like a friend? What do you like about it?”
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Continue with open questions rather than a rapid checklist:
- “What do you use it for?”
- “What did you figure out before you asked the AI?”
- “Did it give you an answer that seemed wrong, strange or uncomfortable?”
- “Where did you disagree with it?”
- “How did you double-check or confirm information that mattered?”
- “What information do you think the app knows about you?”
- “What would you do if the app were unavailable?”
- “When would you rather talk to a person?”
Common Sense Media presents questions like these as conversation prompts, not an interrogation. The Associated Press reports that Michael Robb of Common Sense Media recommends listening first to understand the appeal before explaining your worries.
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Make room for an honest answer. If your teen expects punishment, they may hide the app, delete conversations or avoid telling you about a disturbing response. You can say that learning about the tool does not automatically mean losing access, while still making clear that safety limits are non-negotiable.
Explore one interaction together
Ask your teen to show you a harmless example, such as a creative prompt or a factual question whose answer you can check. Let your teen lead the demonstration. Ask what they expected, what the response did well and what they would question.
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Explain that chatbots can continue a conversation even when a person needs help beyond the system’s abilities. Common Sense Media and Stanford Medicine’s Brainstorm Lab report that tested general chatbots can miss signs of mental-health distress; their assessment found that safety degraded in extended conversations. That is why a reassuring response should not be treated as diagnosis, crisis counseling or a substitute for care.
Teach a repeatable verification habit
Give your teen a short process they can use without you standing over them:
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- Pause. Do not share, submit or act on an answer simply because it sounds polished or empathetic.
- Classify the consequence. A joke or brainstorming idea has a different risk from advice about health, money, safety, school rules or another person.
- Ask what is missing. Have your teen explain the answer in their own words and name any assumptions, uncertainty or claims that need evidence.
- Check independently. Compare important claims with a reliable source, teacher, school guidance, parent or another trusted adult. A second chatbot is not automatically an independent confirmation.
- Choose a human route when needed. If the issue involves danger, severe distress, health symptoms, abuse, self-harm, eating problems or another serious concern, stop relying on the chatbot and involve an appropriate adult or qualified professional.
For schoolwork, agree that your teen will attempt the task first and use AI to explain, practice or brainstorm rather than submit unexamined answers. Whether disclosure is required depends on the school or teacher; do not assume every school has the same policy. Ask what the student worked out independently and how the AI response was checked.
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There is no single privacy rule that applies identically to every chatbot. UNICEF USA notes that tools differ in what they collect, how they use data and what controls they offer. Review the specific service’s current settings and data practices with your teen instead of promising that a conversation is private, anonymous or permanently deleted.
Information to keep out of prompts
- Full name, school name, home address, phone number and regular routes or routines.
- Passwords, account recovery details, precise location and identifying photographs.
- Sensitive information about health, feelings, sexuality, family conflict or finances.
- Names or private details about friends, classmates, relatives or anyone who has not agreed to share them.
Teach a pause-before-posting rule: if a detail would be uncomfortable on a classroom noticeboard or family group chat, do not put it into a chatbot until an adult has checked that the service and its settings are appropriate. The same caution applies to screenshots and copied messages. Discuss whether chats can be saved, reviewed, used to improve a service or accessed on a shared device only after verifying the platform’s current documentation.
Privacy is a shared responsibility. UNICEF’s child-centred AI guidance, version 3, covers safety, data protection and privacy, fairness, transparency, accountability, well-being and preparation with AI skills, including emerging concerns about AI companions. Families can build safer habits, while companies and policymakers also have responsibilities for safer design and appropriate protections for children.
Set boundaries by purpose
A rule that may be reasonable for creative brainstorming may be inadequate when a chatbot is being used as a confidant. Explain the reason for each boundary and write down what your teen should do instead.
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| Use case | Family boundary | Human check |
|---|---|---|
| Homework or study | Attempt the task first; use AI for explanation or practice; follow the teacher’s disclosure rules; check the answer before relying on it. | Teacher, parent or trusted adult when the answer affects grades, safety or understanding. |
| Brainstorming and creative work | Protect personal information and treat generated ideas as material to evaluate, revise and make your own. | Adult review when the content could expose private details or create a harmful situation. |
| Entertainment and role-play | Remember that the system is software, not a friend or person; keep use from crowding out sleep, school, hobbies and relationships. | Parent or caregiver if the interaction becomes secretive, upsetting or difficult to stop. |
| Companionship, emotional support or mental-health advice | Do not use an AI companion as a substitute for friendship, trusted support or professional care. Move serious concerns to a human. | Trusted adult, school counselor or qualified mental-health professional. |
Common Sense Media’s current age guidance says supervised teen use for homework and creativity can be acceptable while advising against AI for under-18s’ companionship, emotional support or mental-health advice. This is that organization’s recommendation, not a universal legal rule.
Mitch Prinstein, chief of psychology at the American Psychological Association, puts the distinction plainly: “We need to teach kids that this is a form of entertainment. It’s not real, and it’s really important they distinguish it from reality and should not have it replace relationships in your actual life.”
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Tell your teen exactly who they can contact when a problem feels too private, urgent or confusing for a chatbot: a parent or caregiver, another trusted adult, a school counselor or a qualified mental-health professional. Make the route practical by discussing how to ask for help, where to go at school and which adults can be contacted outside school hours.
Do not argue about the technology before listening to the feeling underneath it. If your teen says the chatbot is their only support, ask what has been happening, what the chatbot has been providing and who else might help. Robbie Torney, senior director of AI programs at Common Sense Media, states: “It’s not safe for kids to use AI for mental health support.” Dr. Nina Vasan, founder and director of Stanford Medicine’s Brainstorm Lab, warns: “The chatbot becomes a substitute for—rather than a bridge to—real-world support networks and professional care.”
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1Scan for outdated or missing drivers - takes under a minute2Clear out junk files and repair common Windows errors3Fix the driver behind crashes, sound loss and screen glitchesFor immediate danger or a mental-health crisis, involve a trusted adult and appropriate professional or emergency support for your location. The available guidance does not establish one universal crisis-response protocol, so use qualified local services rather than asking a chatbot to decide what to do.
Recognize displacement and distress
One unusual conversation is not proof of a problem. Look for a pattern and ask calmly what the interaction is doing for your teen.
- Excessive or increasingly long sessions.
- Distress, anger or inability to stop when asked.
- Secrecy about the app, account or conversations.
- More anxiety, withdrawal or reliance on AI for emotional comfort.
- Lost time for sleep, schoolwork, friends, family, exercise or hobbies.
- Statements that the chatbot is the only support available or the only entity that understands them.
UNICEF USA recommends gentle questions, simple boundaries and regular check-ins when these signs appear. Start with observations—“I’ve noticed you are staying up later and seem worried when you close the app”—rather than labels such as “addicted.” Ask what your teen wants to change, then agree on one manageable step, such as a device-free bedtime or moving a difficult topic to a trusted adult.
Make a family agreement
Write a short agreement together so expectations are clear before a stressful incident. Include:
- Purpose: which uses are allowed, supervised or off-limits.
- Privacy: the categories of personal and third-party information that stay out of prompts.
- Verification: what must be checked and who can help with consequential answers.
- Human support: the adults and professionals to contact for emotional or safety concerns.
- Time and balance: how sleep, school, hobbies and relationships will be protected.
- Repair: what happens if your teen shares something sensitive, encounters disturbing content or breaks a rule—emphasize disclosure and help before punishment.
Invite your teen to propose wording and explain which rule feels difficult. A plan they helped create is easier to remember and gives you a chance to correct unrealistic restrictions. Keep the agreement visible, review the app’s settings together and schedule a check-in rather than waiting for a crisis.
Review the plan as services change
Revisit the conversation after a major app update, a change in the teen’s use, a new school policy or any incident that felt uncomfortable. Check the service your teen actually uses rather than relying on assumptions about all chatbots. Ask:
- Has the purpose shifted from school or creativity toward companionship or private counseling?
- What information has been shared since the last check, including screenshots or details about other people?
- Can your teen explain how an important answer was verified?
- Is use supporting ordinary life or displacing sleep, school, friends and hobbies?
- Does your teen still know which human to contact when the subject is serious?
The goal is informed, supervised use where it is appropriate—not a promise that any particular service is safe for every teen. Continue listening without shame so your teen can disclose a mistake or upsetting interaction while there is still time to help.
What the evidence does—and does not—show
The 2025 Common Sense Media figures describe U.S. teens ages 13–17 and AI companions, not all chatbot users or all countries. Its mental-health assessment, accessed in 2026, discusses conditions that it says collectively affect approximately 20% of young people, including anxiety, depression, ADHD, eating disorders, mania and psychosis. That estimate is context for the assessment; it is not a statistic about chatbot use.
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UNICEF’s guidance is international and focuses on children’s rights and system responsibilities. UNICEF USA’s family advice does not establish that every AI interaction causes harm. Treat recommendations as guidance, inspect the service your teen uses and base decisions on the teen’s purpose, privacy exposure, ability to verify information and effect on real-world support.
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